Saturday, October 15, 2005
Neil Strauss, PUA, Sex, and Porn:
On Friday, I received the book The Game: Penetrating the Secret Society of Pickup Artists. As you might have guessed, PUA is the acronym for pick-up artist. As I write this, I'm about half-way through the book. The book is a the story of Strauss's journey from AFC "average frustrated chump" to a PUA. This is the same journey and Sidegames and I hoped to embark on a month ago and reading this book has renewed, heck, it has blasted my desire to do this. Now, I doubt I'll ever be good enough to be able to attract gorgeous women as Strauss and his fellow PUA's can, but I hope to be able to at least accomplish what I set out in my previous blog. I want to be fearless when it comes to approaching women, and if I work on my game, I think I'll be able to attract a few of them. In the beginning, I know there will be a lot of rejection, but I think if I work on some of the techniques that are described in the book, I think I can start to attract some women. If I get my exercise program into serious gear like I did three years ago, and if I develop my game well enough, then maybe those beautiful women will eventually be accessible.
I'm already recruited Sidegames to accompany me on this journey. I'm hoping I can also recruit my friend DoorInc. As I explained previously, Sidegames doesn't want his real named used in any of my blogs. I'm refering to DoorInc by his nickname because I'm trying to be confident that we eventually can learn these moves. If we ever do get to the point where we can pickup women at even an average skill level, I doubt DoorInc will want his real name glazing the pages of my blog. As for me, I refuse to hide in total anonymity. This blog is who I am and in addition to the goals I've outlined today, I also want to be more honest here. People who know me in real life know that I'm most honest about stuff than most people. I'm honest about stuff to the point where it puts me in avoidable stressful situations, but I think I've been holding back on this blog because some of my friends know the address. I've been afraid to rant about friends that annoy me or real issues, but that's going to change.
Unlike some guys that might interested in Strauss's book, seduction, or the pick-up game in general, I'm not looking to use women or to have sex with a bunch of women. As stated above, I want to gain the confidence to approach women. I think that confidence will help me with other social interactions. I eventually hope I can find another girlfriend, but of course I wouldn't be opposed to having sex with willing women along the way, even if is during a short term or one-night stand situation.
Like any guy, I love sex. Unlike Seb, the closest example I've seen of a geniune PUA, I don't think I'll be happiest by having sex with with as many new women as possible, as often as possible. He loved cruising the clubs or anywhere for girls, but his goal was to have sex with them that night, or after his first date with them. If they didn't put out, he'd just move on to his next option. I actually think sex is better in a committed relationship. I've had casual sex, and I think sex combined with love is definately better. I learned that from my relationship with Beata. Also, from Beata, I learned how much better sex is without condoms. She was the first girl that I ever done that with and I'm going to miss that. I won't have unprotected sex with a girl I just met, or even a girlfriend I've had for a few weeks so I imagine it will be awhile before I experience that again.
Here begins the openness that I never dared show before in my blog:
Unlike some of the guys I know, other than maybe Sidegames, I think I have an overactive sex drive. An interesting sidenote is that Sidegames, Beata (yes, we're still hanging out as friends, though I'm thinking that's probably a mistake) and I are going to watch I am a Sex Addict at the Chicago International Film Festival. Other friends I've talked to have said that they don't crave sex as much as I do. One married friend is more than satisfied with making love to his wife once a week or less. Other friends have commented that they don't masturbate as much as I do. Sex with Beata was great, but she was never into it. Perhaps, some of that was my fault, as I'm not that experienced, but I know she had issues. The only skills I know I have is that I like to perform oral sex on women, and I have good staying power (probably due to practicing with myself 2-4 times a day). She always complained about pain if we had intercourse for more than 5 minutes, and she didn't let me eat her out often because she said she thought it was gross. Furthermore, when things were going well between us, we had sex probably once a month on average. Sometimes we'd do it a few weeks in a row, but it never happened as often as I'd hoped it would.
I think I'd be happy with a women that would have sex once a week, but I think I'd be happier if it happened more often than that. If she can't provide that, then she better accept that I'm going to watch porn regularly and pleasure myself on the days that we aren't going to have sex. On that thought, I think I'm going to watch Baker's Dozen 4 with Hillary Scott (who's look reminds me of Beata for some reason) and go to bed. As I've said I'm going to be crazily open in this blog, I'm sure porn will reappear in future blogs. Anyone reading should be forewarned.
On Friday, I received the book The Game: Penetrating the Secret Society of Pickup Artists. As you might have guessed, PUA is the acronym for pick-up artist. As I write this, I'm about half-way through the book. The book is a the story of Strauss's journey from AFC "average frustrated chump" to a PUA. This is the same journey and Sidegames and I hoped to embark on a month ago and reading this book has renewed, heck, it has blasted my desire to do this. Now, I doubt I'll ever be good enough to be able to attract gorgeous women as Strauss and his fellow PUA's can, but I hope to be able to at least accomplish what I set out in my previous blog. I want to be fearless when it comes to approaching women, and if I work on my game, I think I'll be able to attract a few of them. In the beginning, I know there will be a lot of rejection, but I think if I work on some of the techniques that are described in the book, I think I can start to attract some women. If I get my exercise program into serious gear like I did three years ago, and if I develop my game well enough, then maybe those beautiful women will eventually be accessible.
I'm already recruited Sidegames to accompany me on this journey. I'm hoping I can also recruit my friend DoorInc. As I explained previously, Sidegames doesn't want his real named used in any of my blogs. I'm refering to DoorInc by his nickname because I'm trying to be confident that we eventually can learn these moves. If we ever do get to the point where we can pickup women at even an average skill level, I doubt DoorInc will want his real name glazing the pages of my blog. As for me, I refuse to hide in total anonymity. This blog is who I am and in addition to the goals I've outlined today, I also want to be more honest here. People who know me in real life know that I'm most honest about stuff than most people. I'm honest about stuff to the point where it puts me in avoidable stressful situations, but I think I've been holding back on this blog because some of my friends know the address. I've been afraid to rant about friends that annoy me or real issues, but that's going to change.
Unlike some guys that might interested in Strauss's book, seduction, or the pick-up game in general, I'm not looking to use women or to have sex with a bunch of women. As stated above, I want to gain the confidence to approach women. I think that confidence will help me with other social interactions. I eventually hope I can find another girlfriend, but of course I wouldn't be opposed to having sex with willing women along the way, even if is during a short term or one-night stand situation.
Like any guy, I love sex. Unlike Seb, the closest example I've seen of a geniune PUA, I don't think I'll be happiest by having sex with with as many new women as possible, as often as possible. He loved cruising the clubs or anywhere for girls, but his goal was to have sex with them that night, or after his first date with them. If they didn't put out, he'd just move on to his next option. I actually think sex is better in a committed relationship. I've had casual sex, and I think sex combined with love is definately better. I learned that from my relationship with Beata. Also, from Beata, I learned how much better sex is without condoms. She was the first girl that I ever done that with and I'm going to miss that. I won't have unprotected sex with a girl I just met, or even a girlfriend I've had for a few weeks so I imagine it will be awhile before I experience that again.
Here begins the openness that I never dared show before in my blog:
Unlike some of the guys I know, other than maybe Sidegames, I think I have an overactive sex drive. An interesting sidenote is that Sidegames, Beata (yes, we're still hanging out as friends, though I'm thinking that's probably a mistake) and I are going to watch I am a Sex Addict at the Chicago International Film Festival. Other friends I've talked to have said that they don't crave sex as much as I do. One married friend is more than satisfied with making love to his wife once a week or less. Other friends have commented that they don't masturbate as much as I do. Sex with Beata was great, but she was never into it. Perhaps, some of that was my fault, as I'm not that experienced, but I know she had issues. The only skills I know I have is that I like to perform oral sex on women, and I have good staying power (probably due to practicing with myself 2-4 times a day). She always complained about pain if we had intercourse for more than 5 minutes, and she didn't let me eat her out often because she said she thought it was gross. Furthermore, when things were going well between us, we had sex probably once a month on average. Sometimes we'd do it a few weeks in a row, but it never happened as often as I'd hoped it would.
I think I'd be happy with a women that would have sex once a week, but I think I'd be happier if it happened more often than that. If she can't provide that, then she better accept that I'm going to watch porn regularly and pleasure myself on the days that we aren't going to have sex. On that thought, I think I'm going to watch Baker's Dozen 4 with Hillary Scott (who's look reminds me of Beata for some reason) and go to bed. As I've said I'm going to be crazily open in this blog, I'm sure porn will reappear in future blogs. Anyone reading should be forewarned.
