Sarging Log: Learning to become a Pick-up Artist

I need to set sarging goals:

I wrote my first field report on mASF the other day and the one responder suggested that I need to set goals. He said that I should try to number close in the next 50 approaches so I can learn calibration. If I try to number close before I eject, he means that I'll learn when a girl is likely to give me a number and when she isn't. This is definately the skill that I need to develop right now.

Today there isn't much to report. Seamas and I went sarging at Alumni Club in Schaumburg. It wasn't that busy for a Friday night and I'm glad as Tuesday was horrible. I was in a good mood today because I had gotten a good amount of sleep and I exercised. I wore the Hawaiian shirt and I'm convinced that helps me get in a better mood. I feel like I'm more of a party guy when I'm wearing those shirts than when I'm just wearing regular clothes.

Seated Set:

At the beginning of the night, I opened a bunch of different sets but ejected right away because I really was just warming up. The first real set was these seated set near the dance floor. One was an HB6, the other a 6.5. It was loud so I was only able to really talk to the HB6.5. The HB6 was good, though, and didn't try to cockblock. Luckily, Seamas rolled in after a few minutes and started talking to the HB6. We stayed in the set for about 5-10 minutes. (On a sidenote, time always seems to fly when I'm doing these sarges so I'm never sure of how much time actually passes.) It turns out this woman and her friend come to AC every Friday night. She has two kids, but doesn't get out much. She seems like the type who would be fascinated by the adventurous guy, i.e. me. We talked about travel a bit and I ran the "Cube" on her. Near the end, the set was starting to stall and I considered number closing, but I kind of stalled. The girl just didn't seem to be that into me. Then, Seamas said he had to go to the washroom so he left and then I just ejected. Later, I saw Seamas dancing with the girl. He pulled me to dance with them, but the HB6.5 didn't seem that interested so I just left and went to sarge some other sets. He left them later and tried to number close but they left before he could.

40 year old set:
I opened this lone wolf that turned out to be a 3 set. I was walking by and just decided to make some funny comments. The set was going pretty well for a bit as I switched off between two of the ladies. The third one then asked if I was going to talk to her as I had been ignoring her. Thionking back on the interaction, I think I started qualifying myself for some reason. It seemed like she had some game as she was married and older. She said she wanted to catch up with her friends but suggested that I should come by later. I didn't care about going back b/c these women weren't that hot and they were married. I do wonder if these suggestions that I come back later are actually legitimate. I suppose the correct answer is that it doesn't matter. If I want sets that say this, I should just come back b/c it's a freeroll. If they didn't want me to come back, they'll just get rid of me. It's better than not going back in a situation where they wanted me to return.

Overall, I think this was a good sarge. Anyone who had watched the whole interaction would have thought I had good game. I had them all laughing and they seemed to be having a good time with me.

Stripper/escort set:
I'm convinced this girl I sarged early in the night was either an escort or a stripper. She was pretty good looking. Seamas said she was an 8.7. I saw here standing alone with a coat on so I made some comment about it being too warm in here for a coat.
Girl: I just got here. I waiting for a friend of mine.
Me: What bring you out here?
Girl: I'm in town for work. Are you from around here?
Me: I'm here for the secret agent convention. I'm talking to people here trying to find the double agents who are hiding in the club.
Girl: Huh? What?
Me: Lol. I'm just messing with you.

I don't really remember much of the rest of the conversation. It turns out she was waiting for some guy friend who was in the bathroom. When he came by, I shook his hand but he seemed to be a total tool. I didn't get the sense that they were together. I suppose she could have been in town for a legitimate job, but for some reason I got the stripper vibe from here. For all I know, though, she was with some AFC guy from work.

I definately fucked up by ejecting from this set. The chick was one of the hotter chicks I've sarged and I was doing okay. She was answering my questions and I wasn't intimidated at all. She had not given me any negative signs so there was no reason to eject. I guess I left b/c she was with that guy friend but that's a stupid reason to leave. Later, I saw them sitting there and the guy seemed to just be hanging around her but they didn't seem to have any real connection. I should have went and talked to her again.

Blonde Table set:

I haven't felt the need to write detailed FR's as I used to in the past probably b/c these sarges seem to be ordinary. I believe this set happened after I bailed on Seamas on the dance floor. First, I pretended to be on the phone. I always do that in the club so I don't feel uncomfortable. Then, I actually checked my voicemail and called Sidegames. As I was talking to him, I noticed this cute 2-set two tables over. After I got off the phone, I walked by them and opened them. I ran the tent opener on the girl closest to me. The other girl was leaning in to listen. I decided to reposition myself in between them so they could both hear me.

I held this set for a good five minutes. I'm always proud of myself when I do this. Both girls had faced me the entire time and I was getting responses to my questions from both of them. I got them to tell me a story about how they were adventurous. The one girl on the right didn't seem to be as interesting nor as interested as the one on the left. Later, it stalled and I sensed that the girls were ready to eject me, so I just said it was fun talking to them and I'd come back later. I think this was actually a good move on my part. I figured I had shown that I was willing to leave before they kicked me out and I figured I could go sarge them later. What I need was Seamas to show up. He did later, but I didn't reengage the set.

Russian shot girl:
I'm friendly with this Russian shot girl. She's always working when I go to AC. For the past six weeks, she's been determined to sell me a shot, but I have refused. At the beginning, I didn't want to waste money on shots. Then, for a time, I wasn't drinking at all so I didn't want any shots. Nowadays, I have one or two beers and I cut myself off. I'd consider getting a shot, but now I kind of like the fact that she wants to sell me a shot so I want to continue playing hard to get. I did promise her that I'll buy a shot next year. I gave her the caveat that I'd do that, but she wouldn't know exactly when I'd do it.

Today, I had my first real conversation with her. I saw she was just standing around b/c she hadn't begun officially working so I went and talked to her. I BSed about how crazy Tuesday was. I figured she made a lot of money, but she said she hardly made any money. She said it was so hard to move around that it limited the amount of shots she could sell. After that, I asked her what her name is. She told me, but I'm not sure I have it right as it's a Russian name. After that, I just left. I figure I'd keep it short to show I'm not needy. I'll continue to small talk with her when I see here in the future. I figure I'll use her as social proof, plus I get social proof b/c she always sees me talking to women.

I definately think she can be social proof. I forgot to mention above that she tried to sell me up to the table two-set. Also, the HB6 & 6.5 set bought a shot from her when she approached us. Later, another set that I had just opened bought two shots from her. She was kind of a CB on that set. She didn't do it intentionally, but she ended up doing it. I had just opened the tent and before I could get any material going, she came in and sold some shots. The girls then left after she sold them the shot. I can't blame them as I had no time to DV. They could only judge me on my looks and I still have a long way to go in that department.

Lessons:
-I really am getting a lot better. When I'm in a good mood, I open pretty well. I can keep most sets going for a few minutes before they stall out. I even opened this set that Seamas thought was bitch set. I went up to them and they didn't seem like bitches at all. They were responding to my questions fine. Seamas then came in. I pulled him into the set but he gave up trying to talk to his target after only asking her one questions. It was okay, though, as they were leaving anyway. The left after we ejected so I know they were on their way out.

-I got it reinforced again that uglier girls aren't easy to sarge than prettier girls. Seamas is finally convinced of this. He said in the car that he wants me to only open sets with hot girls in the future. He feels like he doesn't have the same drive to succeed with girls that aren't as good looking, and it seems like a waste of effort to game UG's. My current modus operandi just has me opening as many sets as I can. If I see a two sets, I just go up and start talking to them even before I determine how hot they are. The exception is that I don't generally go talk to warpig only sets. There's not real point if there are other sets to talk to.

-I'm opening a lot more. I talked to at least 10 sets tonight. Some were just warmups but they still count in that I got some practice. I opened this on UG6 that was sitting by the Golden Tee machine. While I was playing, she had like reached into the space between the machine and me. She then apologized. I knew that she wasn't me to talk to her; otherwise, why would she do that? She ended up leaving to go get a drink and when I saw her come back, I just started talking to her. We talked for like 5 minutes but I knew I busted out when I told her I play cards and she said she hates gambling. She didn't leave for another 2 minutes though.


Sticking points:
-Same fucking thing. I just need to try to number close. #closing has become the equivalent of the approach anxiety I had at the start of my journey. I need to pop my cherry and just ask a girl for her number. I think that once I do that, I'll start doing it more often. I then I could have tried a #close on HB6.5 before it stalled.

-Ejecting. I ejected from that HB set that I suspected might be a stripper. It probably wasn't a big deal assuming she actually had been a stripper b/c chances are that my sarge would have failed. My excuse for ejecting there was that I didn't feel like dealing with the guy (in retrospect, I'm almost certain he was a nonfactor) and I was just warming up.

-Reengage sets. When I've ejected, I've usually said that I'll be back later. I should actually follow through.

Postscript:
It's funny that I said at the beginning that there was nothing to report. It seems that after I do a lot of sarging, I like to type so that's why I typed a ton.

My goal right now is the number close. I just need to do it and see what happens. I've read mASF enough to know that I'm going to get a ton of flakes so I might as well start getting number so I can at least get a chance to practice phone game.

I imagine within the next few weeks, I'll be number closing more often. Then, phone game will be a sticking point. After that, Day2's & 3's will be SP. I suppose LMR & ASD will be SP's too. I need to get past my current hurdle so I can reach the challenges ahead. Since my game was so weak before, I need a lot of work. Still, I think if I sarge consistenly for the next year, I'll have real game by this time next year.

Approach Anxiety:

For some reason, I had approach anxiety today during club game. Part of the problem was that we started the night late so I didn't get any time to warm up. When I get approach anxiety again, I have to remember three points.

1) I have to believe that I offering value to the girls. If they let the sarge go on long enough, they'll realize that I actually will make their lives more interesting.

2) Rejection isn't a big deal. I'll feel worse if I don't make approaches than I would if I got horribly shot down. Nowadays, I think my approach anxiety is less about rejection (though that's still there) but more about how I hate having to deal with the awkward stalls in the conversation. Still, rejection and stalls are way lesser evils than not approaching at all.

3) Today, Seamas and I sat next to this set at Mother's Bar on Division. We saw a HB7 or 7.5 two set sitting there. I violated the 3 second rule so we ended up not talking to them right away. Just as I was almost ready to approach, some tool started talking to them. I thought he'd bust out right away as he was leaning into the table. He actually last quite awhile. At one point, the one girl left the friend with the guy. This was another mistake I made. I knew she was a lone wolf at that point and Seamas even told me to approach her but I didn't. Some AMOG ended up approaching her. About 10 minutes later, both guys were busted out of the set. You could tell by the body language that they girls weren't interested. Previously, they had been close to the guys, but now they were on the opposite side of the table and they were keeping the guys away. Seamas read strongly that the girls wanted the guys to leave. I knew that we should go AMOG them, but I wasn't feeling in the zone.

Eventually, Seamas went up to one of the girls and said that we were just about to talk to them when that tool went up. She was cool with him. He just said that and then walk back to the table. She followed and talked to him, but then they left. He should have kept talking to her. She had told him that she and her friend were leaving b/c the two tools wouldn't leave them alone.

Conclusion: Approach anxiety resulted in those girls having a bad evening b/c we allowed those idiots to move in on them.

I made my first post and FR on mASF.



Leaving rough draft here: I never finished editing this and don't feel like it. In case there are any gems of info for me, I'm leaving it here.

Getting good at early game, l..

I have this tendancy to be too hard on myself. This is great as it drives me to succeed in life. That was the force that drove me to get good grades and always try to improve myself in whatever I do. Unfortunately, that same drive can create feelings of inadequacy. I'm convinced that I've had periods of depression because I was too hard on myself. Rather than focus on the successes that I have, or the improvements I've made, I focus on what still needs to be done. My inner voice is now telling me that my game is weak because of stupid mistakes I've made in the past few days. Fortunately, there is another voice that is telling me to look on the bright side.

Weird opening:
I can't stop thinking of this weird situation that happened near the end of my night at Coachlite bar on Roselle Road. I had been in the bar a few times so I had made about 4-5 approaches. I was doing my usual walk around the bar when a guy suddenly reached out his hand and grabbed mine. I looked at him and he said, "Have you ever kissed a guy?" I saw that he was with a cute girl HB7. (Honestly, I can't remember how hot she was. She was definately skinny and cute by I was so surprised at the whole situation that my memory is foggy). I respond, "No, and I don't plan to unless maybe she kissed me." I then walk about 15 feet to where my friends were standing.

The guy then comes up to me and says, "Sorry, she put me up to it." I then go up to her and say, "Why are you being shy? If you want to kiss me, just ask me." She then turns to the guy and whispering in his ear for a few seconds. Then she walks back towards me. She stands about 4-5 feet away facing me. The guy walks next to her and says to her, "Do you want to kiss him?" After she said that, she stood there for about 5-10 seconds more and then they walked away.

I thought about what had happened and about 30 seconds later, it dawned on me that I should have just walked up to her and kiss her. One of my wings said I should have put my arm around her waist and made my move. I decided to go look for them but I couldn't find them. I think they left out of embarassment or something.

Other sticking points:
-On Tuesday, I engaged this 38 year old HB7.5 for about 30-40 minutes. I didn't number close. The first mistake was when I ran the ESP test late in the set. I asked her to pick a number between 1&4. I guessed "3" and she said that she hadn't picked number yet. I then run part two. She sits there thinking and I say, "Okay, what's your number?" She says, "I don't have a phone number, I only have a cell." For a moment, a voice tells me I should ask her for her cell number and #close, but instead I say, "No, I meant what's your number between 1&10." Later in the set, she backturned me and talked to an AFC when I busted on her. I tried running "The Cube" on her but she said she couldn't focus at the bar. I stupidly came out with a barrage of busting, "Why can't you? You work here (it was her day off) and you can't block this out. " She said, "I just can't." I continued, "I thought you were adventurous and had a good imagination." I then looked away and backturned. Instead of engaging me, she went and talked to this AFC coworker. My wing thought I dropped her value too much and that's why she left. He even mentioned that he nudged me with his elbow when he heard me do the first bust.

-I need to plod every set. I sometimes eject during stalls, usually at the beginning of the night as I don't feel like I'm in my total sarge mode. I should always remember Gunwitch's "Make the 'ho say no."

-I don't know what to do when girls open me. Well, I know the theory, but it still feels so weird when it happens that I momentarily revert to a AFC. I respond with some lame BS and then she usually walks away. I think I need to immediately go into a routine if I can't think of anything to say.

-I need to go find targets that give me good vibes. My friend had opened this two set that turned out to be a mixed 3 set. I had talked to one of the girls and the guy. I felt like things had stalled, even though my buddy was still talking to a target. Suddenly, the third girl comes up and introduces herself, asks my name and then shakes my hand. Unfortunately, the girls got their drinks right after this and the AMOG (I could tell he was an AFC after I talked to him, but he still was smart enough to lead them to another part of the bar after getting the drinks.) About 5 minutes later, I'm standing there talking to my pivot (one of my wing's cousins) and that same set walked by me. As they were walking by, the girl who introduced herself to me said, "Hi" and lifted up her beer to toast me. I didn't have a drink so I toasted with my fist. The girl kept walking, though, as her friend and pivot were behind her. I'm pretty sure that I should have tried to find that set immediately, but instead I didn't and ended up opening a new set about 3-4 minutes later.

Sticking Point: The #Close

This has been my biggest sticking point. I had the sarge at AC Schaumburg with the twin sister and the tatoo girl in Kaanapali, Maui. Both of those sets lasted over 30 minutes and I know that I could have number closed but I failed to do so. I think part of the reason is that the sarge has gone well so far at that point that I don't want to risk messing things up. I know it's a stupid way of thinking, but it's programmed into my psyche.

Dead club, warm ups:

We went to Cadillac Ranch in Barlett. I hadn't been there in a few years, but I will definately go there again. The setup is still good and there are multiple areas where you can have a conversation as the music isn't overwhelming. Tonight was slow, but there was no cover. We had originally gotten there at 10PM, but we could tell by the parking lot that things were dead. Seamas suggested that we go grab food. We came back at about midnight and things still looked pretty dead but I said we should go in as it would be better than just going home.

When we walked in we saw that there weren't that many sets to open. There were a few couples and a few mixed sets. There was also an older warpig set, but before we could even talk about opening them, they left. We grabbed a table and I sat there for at least 1.5 hours without sarging. Around 1am, more people arrive and the club population tripled in size. Finally, I decided to get myself into sarging mode. I have now decided that I have to stop sitting down. The physics saying "A body in motion tends to stay in motion. A body are rest tends to stay at rest" is very applicable here. When I'm sitting down, I feel like I don't have the energy to get up and sarge. When I'm constatly walking around scoping the place out, I feel like I have more energy. Also, by moving around, I run into more sets and I end up opening more.

I stood for about 10 minutes and still didn't feel like I could sarge. Finally, Seamas said he wanted to check out the dance floor. He had been hesitant to get up because he wanted to hold on to the table. If we are to do sarging and maintain a table, we need to go with more people. Some warpig pivots or AFC's are good for this task. We got up and walked around and then we went to the bathroom. At some point, I just clicked on "sarge mode" and started things rolling. I approached some guys with some random BS questions to get myself in a social mood. I opened about three guys then I walked around. An AMOG with a girl commented that I was "lighting up the place with my shirt." My immediate gut reaction was to whip out some AMOG line like "I'm glad you're looking out for my fashion sense," but I decided that the comment wasn't obnoxious so I just noded and kept walking.

One set:
I walked around near the entrance of the bar and opened this 3 set that had been sitting there the whole night. I opened an HB6.5 with piercings: HBPierced. I opened with my usual tent opener: I want to get a female opinion. Would you date a guy that lived a tent?
Pierced: No.
Me (I used to get this answer a bunch of times when I first started using this opener, so this is almost the best answer that I can hear. The last few outings, I've been getting more thought out answers which actually caused me to stall b/c I had no idea how to respond to a non "No" answer). Isn't that kind of shallow? Come on, I don't believe it. I hear about all these romance novels that you women love. The guy falls in love with the pool guy or stable hand. You're telling me if a Brad Pitt look-a-like came in, you'd ditch him if he lived in a tent. Pretend we're standing here, and this guy walked in. Pretend that I'm gay for a second, and imagine you look over and make eye contact with him. Your eyes stay locked and you start to feel that butterfly feeling in your stomach. He walks over and you feel completely comfortable talking to him. If you found out a few weeks later that he lived in a tent, would you dump him?
We then fluffed for a few minutes. At one point, HbPierced friend started to look bored. I noticed this because Pierced leaned over to make a comment. I then decided to disarm this obstacle so I talk to her.

I believed I said, "You look like your getting tired. What's wrong?"
Redhead: Nothing. I'm fine.
I then fluff talked her for a bit and I was thinking that it would be great if I had a wing. Luckily, Seamas had decided to show up. He hovered in back, which I think is a good move. I've had wings just come up and stand next to me. I don't like this because of what has happened in the past. I might be in the middle of a good routine or story and I find that the sudden arrival of my wing created an awkward break. This time, I motioned for him to come over and I said in his ear, "I need you to disarm this redhead." I then asked the redhead what her name is and then I introduce my wing.

I went back to the Pierced girl but she seemed less interested. We fluffed for a bit and then some guy friend starting talking to her. He left and I tried to talk a bit but she backturned me. I just stood there for a few seconds contemplating my move when suddenly this blonde that was next to HBPierced started talking to me.

Shirt got me opened leading to good rapport:

I found out that this woman was 38 but she was still good looking. I'd give her like a 7 or 7.5 but Seamas thinks she was an 8. Rating don't really matter that much. Mostly they are ego stroking. Someone called out some people in the FR b/c they constantly report on supposed HB9's & HB10's. Anyway, she opened me about this shirt. (I love these Hawaii shirts and I wish I had bought more. The thing is that I know I'm going to end up being the Hawaiian shirt guy if I keep doing this in the same venues.) She said that she used to see a lot of these shirts when she lived in Florida. I said that I got this shirt in Hawaii.
Girl: I've never been there.
Me: It's great. You should go there, but I recommend not going to Honolulu.
Girl: My parents have been to Maui and... Waikiki, wherever that is.
Me: It's in Honolulu. I was just in Maui a few weeks ago. It's great, I'd recommend that. It all depends on what you like to do though. What do you do for fun.
Girl: I love roller coasters.

We chat about roller coasters for about 10 or more minutes. This was great because she was talking a lot. Near the end, she started kinoing me while telling the story. Also, I should mention that I was facing sideways at the beginning of the sarge. At one point, I think near the beginning of this roller coaster thread, I realized she was fully facing me. Once I noticed this, I immediately turned to face her completely. Later, I found out that she is a HUGE Stephen King fan. That's great because I used to read Stephen King a ton when I was younger.

We talk for a long time and I think about, I think this girl would have been wild. She was definately adventurous and she even mentioned she was bi. She says that she loves reading true crime serial killer stuff b/c she likes to know what goes on in people's heads. I brought up the movie "Monster." She then commented that she loves Charlize Theron b/c she thinks Charlize is incredibly sexy. She then mentioned that she's bi b/c I guess she felt that came out weird. I agreed about Charlize but I said my current favorite is Jessica Alba.

Passed up a good spot for the # close.
At one point we stalled and I tried to do the number game on her. When I guessed "3" as her first number, she said she hadn't thought of a number yet when I asked. I then asked her to pick a different number between 1-10. She sat there thinking and then I said, "What's your number."
Girl: Well, I don't have a home phone, I only have a cell.
Me: No. What's your number between 1 and 10. You said that you needed time to think last time.

I'm a fucking dumb ass. Obviously, she wanted to give me her number. She had slipped on the question I had asked b/c it had been on her mind. I had gotten several good IOI's, kino several times, good eye contact, and she was into the conversation. Now she did this. The thought crossed my mind that I should have closed right there, but I was too into running my routine. Also, I'm sure the fact that I fear #closing and that I'm inexperienced in this part of the game contributed to my mistake.

Mistake #2: Busting in rapport stage:

After the #test failed, I busted her by saying that she was overthinking the numbers and that's why my reads were wrong. I then told her that I could do better. By asking her four (it's five questions, but I slipped) questions, I tell her stuff about herself that she might not even know. Girl: How did you know how to do that? Is that your job?
Me: No.
Girl: What is your job?
Me: Cigarette lighter repairman and I run a midnight auto business at night.
Girl: Really? What's that?
Me: It's the only business where the parts of a whole are worth more than the whole. I have these independent contractors who gets wholes for me and then I break them down into the higher valued parts. I then sell those to someone else. I'm like a middleman.
Girl: She's either buying it or doesn't want to bust me on it.
Me: You do realize that I'm just messing with you right?

I then tried to do the Cube again.
Girl: I can't picture anything. I guess I can't block out the club music.
Me (major busting, probably overboard. Seamas thinks that she probably felt low value since she was older. I had demonstrated value and it really bad to bust her that much. Also, I realized quickly afterwards that I had busted when I had already been in rapport. Busting is for the attraction stage.) Why not? You should be able to as you work here. (I found out that she and the redhead worked at CR.)
Girl: I can't do it.
Me: I thought you adverturous and that you had a great imagination. I then looked away and did a slight takeaway.

She then started talking to this AFC bartender guy that seemed to be off duty as well. She walked over like 5 feet to talk to him. I stood there like an idiot and then I decided to open a guy that was standing next to me so I wouldn't feel like a tool.

Lessons:
-I need to make my first approach as soon as possible because I become a machine after that.

-I'm used to sarging alone. When I do that, I open guys first to warm up and then I get in the right zone and I start opening girls. When I'm with wings, I find that I use them as crutches. I'll talk to them and that doesn't get me into the right sarging mood. I need to leave them early and start opening guys.

-I shouldn't be surprised that I worked better in this club. The girls could actually hear me. I seem to do well in these situations. I have to avoid the defeaning clubs because I have very little game there.

-I need to focus my energy on # closing. Once I do it, I know it'll start to disappear as a sticking point. I know the lines but I haven't actually used them. I plan on using the following routine, "I've enjoyed talking to you. What steps would we have to take to make sure we can talk again?"
If the girl doesn't offer her number, I'll say, "It's the 21st Century and all. You'd think we could figure out a way to talk when we're not together. Hmm. (pull out cell phone). Take this little device. I think it might be able to help us."

-Stop busting in rapport stage. If I bust, limit it to one bust, and not a barrage of busts.

-I should have reopened the girl. I could have disarmed the AFC coworker and talked to her again. Instead, I walked away and looked for more sets to open. At this time it was like 3:20 and the bar was dead. No sets for me so I stood around watching some girls and guys making out on the dance floor.

-I stalled several times with the other 2 girls, but I made sure to keep plodding. I'd go into another routine. I need to just ask random, open-ended questions, if I run out of routines.

-I must always remember not to be too critical of myself. Seamas reminded me that I got pretty far and I definately could have number closed. Next time, I just have to do it. This is huge progress from before when I could only make conversations like 1-2 minutes. This is immeasureable better than when I used to stand around the entire night and make zero approaches.

# posted by Ted : 06:27  0 comments

Negative & Positive people:

I got this lesson reinforced today. I talked to Sidegames and my mother and the combined power of their comments helped put me in a bad mood. Luckily for me Seamas called me. He extended an invitation to come to his family Christmas party at his parents house and we discussed the negative conversations I had had. By talking through the problems, I was able to get in a better mood which I might have taken a day or two to snap out of otherwise. The lesson, of course, is that I shouldn't be around negative people and more than that, I should do my best to surround myself with positive people.

80% of approaches made:

I'm just throwing out this number, but I believe that's my current percentage of approaches I actually make at the club. I need to get that higher, but it isn't too much of a sticking point. Today, I wasn't in the greatest of moods, but I still opened almost all the sets that I wanted. I almost always open lone wolves if I happen to see them. I'll almost always open 2-5 sets. I opened my first mixed set today. The girls wasn't that interested, so I just went to talk to the guy just to show that I don't give a fuck. Of course, he thought I was cool. Other than that one set, I have never opened a mixed set. I passed over 2-3 mixed sets today that I wanted to approach. At this club that we went to, there was a seating bench that ran along a wall, and there were tables in front. I saw two sets sitting behind tables, but I avoided approaching them. I just felt it would be too awkward. The music was so loud, that I know they woudln't hear me unless I was next to them. I knew that I couldn't peck, so the only way they could hear me would be if I just sat down next to them. This is a sticking point, and I need to work on this. I had two good opportunities where I could have tried an approach. The first was when I saw some black guy get rejected. This was after the black guy's friend had tried to help his wing. I knew that I could have come in and talked about the blowup. The next opportunity would have been to sit down next to this guy I had talked to briefly. He had sat down at a table. I could have sat down next to him, turns to my right, said a few words to him, and then turn to the left and sarged a two set.

Loud music, Small Venue, bad sarging:

Today, I think I finally understand why I generally perform poorly in Chicago venues. With the exception of Lion Head Pub/The Aparment on Lincoln (we need to hit that again), all the other venues I've been going to are not good for my current method of sarging. First, the venue is small which means there are fewer chicks to sarge over a night than Alumni Club (and probably Cadallic Ranch). In addition, the later two probably have more girls than the average club in Chicago because there aren't too many competing places in the suburbs. On Division Street, for example, there are at least 10 places to enter. The second factor is the loud music. AC & CR have loud music, but since they are both large, there are multiple areas where I can hold a decent conversation. In the small venues, it's almost impossible to carry out a conversation anywhere except a few select places. Of course these quieter places in the small Chicago venues don't have too many girls nearby. At AC, I can keep circling the main bar, and go upstairs (on weekends) and run into multiple sets throughout the night. In the small Chi-venues, I have to wait for girls to be near the quiet zone, or I have to try to sarge even though the girl can't hear me.

The fact that the girl can't really hear me creates some major problems for my game. First, I'm not bad looking, but I still need to lose like 50 lbs, so I need to seduce women primarily with what I say. Sure, I do my best to have alpha body language and to show confidence in the way I stand, but I get judged by what I say when I actually approach. In AC, the two girls in a 2-set can hear me and they usually both pay attention to me. I can then run best friend's test and generally get both girls to participate in the conversation. In the Chicago places, the two girls can almost never hear me. Even if I can get one girl to start to get interested in the coversation, the other ones starts to get bored. On top of that, the target also has a difficult time hearing me. I believe that the girl views me as Beta as she can't hear me. Furthermore, I can't get her interested in the conversation or in me when she can't understand most of what I'm saying.

Moron Amogs & Stop ejecting, moron:

The first set I opened was a 2-set. At the time, that was like the only non mixed set there so I saw a bunch of guys approach them. Finally, I decided to make some sort of move. I talked to one girl for like 30 secs, then I ejected because neither Jason nor Seamas had come with me. A few minutes later, I walked by them and opened them again. Some black guy with a bandana on his head looked at me as I opened the blonde (he was talking to the brunette). I'm convinced the idiot thought he could AMOG me just by looking at me. Sure, he was more muscular than me, but he was my height and I wasn't scare of him. I just shook his hand and said, "Hi" and then I talked to the blonde. Jason then happened to show up and started talking to the set. I think we helped mess things up for the AMOG, but then the set stalled and we ejected.
I later approached that set a third time. The brunette was talking to a white guy. I said to the blonde, "Wow, you are the center of attention here. I keep seeing guys approaching. What's the worse line you've heard today?"
Blonde (pondering for a few seconds): Well, she's actually the one getting approached today.
Me: What's the worse line you've ever heard.
Blonde:
Me: Lol. At least it wasn't what I heard some guy say. He opened using some sexual line. (Here I should have said, "I heard the guy say, 'How'd you like me to eat your pussy all night until you were dying to have me in you?' Isn't that pathetic? What a pervert." I reading hearing that on fastseduction as a GM type line to drop in. The girl shouldn't get pissed b/c I'm just relying what some moron at a club said to a girl. Next time I need to say this.)

We then fluffed for a bit, and then I ejected for some reason. I think it was partially b/c I felt I didn't do a good job on one of her shit tests. She had commented (after we had talking about lame lines) that she wouldn't date a guy she met at the club anyway. She said, "If you got married, what you tell your grandkids? I met him in a club." My lame reponse was, "I'm sure people have me that way but they probably lied about it. Later, I saw a pair of guys work the set. I think they did pretty well as they stayed in for over 20 minutes. Later, I couldn't find the girls, so I don't know if they venue changed with the guys or just gave the #'s and then left. Either way, I was the idiot. I was doing okay with the blonde and I should have kept plodding until I got rejected.

Better possible responses to the blondes comment about meeting guys in the club.

-Bust on her for that in the same way that I don on girls who say they wouldn't date a guy who lived in a tent. I could do my pattern, or just use the quick Brad Pitt lookalike+butterfly feelings.

-If you met that special someone who understands you in a way no one else can, then who cares how you met?

-If you knew me, you wouldn't be saying this. (Too cocky, or is it C&F?)

-Why are you thinking about that? Take it easy, you haven't won me over yet!

HB8.5 or 9:
I saw a 6 foot tall, thin blonde who might have been a HB9. (I'm still trying to figure out my personal scale.) I found out she was Russian. I made some situational comment, then asked her where she was from as I detected an accent. When she said she was Russian, I said "Hi" in Russian. Then I tried the "upside down Christmas tree open" and then she ejected. Still, she was one of the hottest chicks that I've ever approached so I'm glad I did that. Of course she was a lone wolf when I approached her, so that made it easier. Also, I saw some AFC (Seamas says the guy was acting like a BAFC) eyeing the girl, so I decided to make him envious by approaching the girl that I knew he was hoping he could approach.

Plodding pays off:
These two girls were dancing near Jason & Seamas for about the last hour. The blonde seemed to be really into dancing. Jason and her friends had tried to get her to go on the little stage in the middle of the dancefloor. She had gone up twice but she got self-conscious and then came down right away. I saw the girls go to the bar so I told Seamas that we should go sarge them. He said he'd come with so I was forced to not be a bluffer so I went over there. (I word it like this b/c I felt some hesitation but I didn't want to disappoint.)

I go up to the blonde and say, "Hi. I saw you dancing over there. You have pretty good moves, but I'm wondering why you wouldn't get on stage."
Blonde: I don't really know how to dance.
Me: (BTW, this shows that many girls probably really are self- conscious about their dancing. I had heard that this was the case in a mASF post, but this helped prove it for me in the field. I thought she had done a good job earlier, but clearly she wasn't so confident in herself.) That's not true, I saw your moves. Are you just not adventurous?
Blonde: (I don't remember exactly what she said, but it wasn't bad. Slightly better than neurtral.)

By this time, Seamas was standing like 4 feet away from me so I motioned for him to come in. I then told him in his ear that he should talk to one of the girls. He started talking to the brunette. The blonde and I were just standing there listening. The problem was that we were criss-crossed. I moved him to be next to the girl, but I didn't tell him to switch over. Last week, I would indicate to Jason physically that he should move next to the girl he was talking too, but I also would tell him that we should switch. After I had moved Seamas, he turned to me and started talking to me. I guess he thought I was trying to get his attention instead of trying to move him. By doing this, he backturned his girl. She then turned around and I turned around too.

Seamas then thought the sarge was over. I told him that we really didn't get rejected. I said I could reopen the set. He told me to do it then. I hesitated. After like 2 minutes, I realized the girls were still standing there so I went up and said, "Hey. I want you to help settle a debate. Would you date a guy that lived in a tent?"
Girl: No. (very adamantly) NO!
Me: Come on, I don't believe that. I hear about these romance novels that women love. They marry the pool guy or stable hand.
Girl: No way.
Me: You're telling me that you wouldn't care if the guy looked like Brad Pitt. Imagine that he gave you that butterfly feeling in your stomach when you talked to him. If you found out later that he lived in a tent, you'd still ditch him?
Girl: Well, if the guy were a noble prize winner or something I might. Intelligence is better than money.
Me (thinking, score. I know I'm pretty smart. I figured I could get this going.) I then noticed that the blonde was just sitting there with a pissed off look on her face. I tried to engage her. I said, "Cheer up. You have a angry look on your face." The blonde woudln't cheer up and she said something to me that I couldn't hear.

I should mention that I forgot to add that the brunette at one point had tried to tell me they were lesbians. She said she gave this locket to the blonde. I don't know if it was true, but I doubted it. I figured it was a shit test. I had just blown by that. In this second approach, the blonde was showing me the locket after I called her out on her angry mood. I then just said it was nice talking to them and I ejected. I could tell that I had gotten the brunette to open up but the blonde wasn't liking me, and the brunette was starting to close off b/c of this.

I guess the lesson I learned from this is that I was able to get girls to open up more after plodding. Even if they give firm answers or backturn, you can still win them back. AGAIN I JUST HAVE TO FUCKING MAKE SURE TO FOLLOW GUNWITCH'S ADVICE: MAKE THE HO' SAY NO. I never eject. The girls either leave or tell me to leave, or I close. Those are the only three possible outcomes.

Sister of Seamas:

I made a few attempts to try to talk to her at the party. First, I had the problem that I wanted to watch the bears game. When I went to the dining room at half time, Seamas and she were there but I talked mostly to Seamas. She wasn't really in the conversation. Later, I stopped watching the game in the early fourth quarter as I didn't think the game could be interesting again. I went to find the sister. She was sitting next to Seamas on the couch, but they were involved in some movie game. Later, I came back and stole her couch seat. Seamas tried to get her to tell me about some lame line some guy had used on her in school. (On a sidenote, I think the sister is shy. She seemed hestitant to tell this short story.)

I did have an opportunity for isolation but I hesitated and then didn't do it. Almost everyone had left except for the immediate family. Seamas's stepdad was asleep in the den. Seamas's older sister, her fiance, the sister that I want, Seamas's mother, Seamas, and I were at the kitchen table. At one point, the sister I want got up and went to the kitchen. Immediately it occurred to me that I should find an excuse to get up too. My water glass was empty and so was the pitcher. I knew I should go and get a refill and then start talking to the sister. Instead, I sat there and then the sister came back with some snacks. That was a weak move on my part. That was my best chance.

I'm still convinced I'd have a chance with her. First, she seems shy and this goes with what Seamas had told me in the past. He had said that even though she's pretty, somehow she hasn't really dated that much. Back then, he said she didn't get approached much, but today he said that she has gotten approached more lately, but apparently she doesn't have a serious boyfriend. I'm sure he would have been at the party if she had and Seamas would have told me. What this means is that she wouldn't be ready for my rAFC game. She was used to AFC or BAFC game, so I could overwhelm her with all the good stuff I've learend from mASF, fastseduction.com, and bristollair.com. Second, I feel like I got an IOI from a lame joke I told. Seamas couldn't find his phone so he asked me to call it with my phone. Seamas's mom said that she often has to do this. I commented that I do sometimes too, but I hate it when I can't find my phone and it's on silent mode. Seamas's sister than busted out laughing, and it wasn't that funny of a remark. I don't think Seamas's mom even giggled, and neither did I. Finally (and I'll admit this point is weak as she could just be a friendly, polite person in general) but she she has made sure to say "Hi" and "Bye" to me even before I specifically address her upon arriving or departing.

I guess some other side points are that I know I've shown confident and alpha body language when I've been around her. I made sure to sit back at the table and on the couch, I didn't cross my arms nor my legs. Also, I have some social proof b/c I'm at this dinner, and I'm cool with both her mother and father. That fact, though, reminds me of how weak it is for me not to have spent more time trying to talk to her. I shouldn't be worried of the parents getting the wrong idea b/c I've already have some acceptance from them. Now, of course, even if I had turned her on, she couldn't kiss me there or whatever, but it woudln't look like I was sarging her if I just had made more conversation.

# posted by Ted : 05:41  0 comments

It's my blog and I'll bitch if I want too...

Okay, so what do I do now with my sleep schedule? I've now been up almost 23 hours and I had gotten up then with only 2 hours of sleep. So since, 7Pm Thursday, I've had 2 hours of sleep in nearly 38 hours. The funny thing is that I'm still not sleepy. I know I'll fall asleep within minutes of my head hitting the pillow, but I don't feel complete exhaustion. I do want to watch the NFL games at noon, though I think I'd allow myself to sleep until 3PM until the Colts-Seahawks game. If I get up at noon, how well rested am I going to be? I'll be totally exhausted, and getting up at 3pm won't make me feel rested either.

I guess I know that staying up until noon to start watching the game is most definately going to be the worst decision. Since I don't want to stay up until noon, I guess I set the alarm at noon. If I can get up, great. If not, I guess I try to get up for the Indy game.

Hmmm. For some reason, it feels good to just type and vent that...

Can a straight guy really be "just friends" with women?:

Seamas, his cousin (whom I will now call JS for brevity), and I were discussing this very topic. She is convinced that she has guy friends that don't have a secret desire to sleep with her. Seamas and I said that she was wrong. We basically said that all guys (as the title says, we are referring to straight guys here) who are friends with girls have a desire to sleep with these female friends. The desire may be obvious: for example, an AFC or BAFC who keeps buying a girl stuff while being "friends." It's obvious to the girl that the guy desperately wants to sleep with her. Of course the guy may make it seem like he wants a relationship, as he is afraid to show his sexuality, but we all know what he really wants. The desire may also be well hidden. In the past, I've had friends who became friends with girls but secretly (well, they told me but kept it from girls) wanted to sleep with the girls. Some of these girls really believed that these guy friends were different that the typical AFC. They believed these guys truly wanted to be their friends and weren't just secretly plotting or just waiting to score sex. We believe that JS friends fall into this exact category of guy friends with secret desires. We argue that they desire her sexually and she denies this because they are good at keeping it secret.

The scenario I kept using to try to convince JS of my point is that if she suddenly threw herself upon these guys, they would reveal their true feelings by having sex with her. Seamas argued that JS could prove the guy's hid sexual desires with a less extreme test. He said that JS's guy friends weren't traditional friends in the sense that her guy friends treated her differently that they would treat other guy friends. Suppose that that JS knocked on her male roommate's (her example of a guy friend who has no interest in having sex with her) door in the middle of the night and said , "I'm having a horrible day. Can you do me a favor and let me sleep in your bed (meaning just sleeping and no sex)?" She said that her roommate would refuse. We argued that he would definitely allow her to sleep in his bed. Furthermore, he would refuse the exact request from a guy friend. His refusal shows that he has a different relationship with JS than a traditional friendship. By traditional friendship, we mean a typical friendship that exists without sexual tension or desire between two heterosexual males.

Personal confession:
I'll take this opportunity to admit that in my AFC days, I would be friends with girls because I secretly desired to have sex and relationship with them. Sex was of course what I wanted immediately, but I genuinely did care about these females friends so I often envisioned that I would want to have a relationship. Additionally, I viewed that succeeding in both having sex with them and having a relationship with though was the best (and possibly only) path to getting more sex in the future. For many girls, I think these desires became obvious. Take my redheaded neighbor that strung my AFC ass along. She knew what I wanted yet kept letting me buy her stuff and take her out even though she knew it was unlikely she'd ever give me what I wanted. She strung me along for a long time while giving me very little. I felt frustrated often, but I'd often see glimpses of progress. One time, she showed me her redhaired pussy. Later, I felt great b/c she let me eat her pussy (which was actually my first time doing that). In my AFC days, though, a part of me had always been angry at her for stringing me along. Nowadays, I realize that she didn't necessarily string me along intentionally to milk me for gifts and dinners. Furthermore, I think it's my fault that I let myself get strung alone because I was an AFC or BAFC. It was only after I enter my quest to be a PUA that I finally feel like I've found internal closure with that girl. The experience was a good lesson that was part of a journey that lead me to change my life. Also, when I ate her pussy, I could have fucked her, but I didn't have any skills, so again that was my own fault. I know that if I would have gotten intercourse from her that day, I would have had such regret about my actions.

In a slightly different situation were two friends that I grew up with. We had always been friends because our parents were friends so we grew up together. In many ways, they are more like sisters than friends because we've known each other for so long. Since we are actually not related, there is no reason for me not to feel sexual desire for them. Ever since I knew about sex, I had always wished something would happen with one of them, preferably the older one because I knew her better. When she got her first serious boyfriend, I was jealous that we had never tried dating. As I remained a virgin in those days, I always wished that one of them would have relieved me of my burden. Later, after I got some dating and sexual experience, the feelings changed. I felt less of the burning desire I had felt earlier and just thought that it would be nice to have sex with them. After all, I was close to them and I felt it would be fun to take our relationship to another level. Currently, I don't really feel that way about them. They have gone back to their proper place as female friends that are almost sisters. The word "almost" is important there because I know I haven't achieved true friendship here without desire.

Lithmus test of female friendship:

I don't feel as if I've achieved this ideal female friendship because right now, I'd probably have sex with them if they offerend themselves to me. I'm not going to actively pursue this outcome, but if they offered, I'd probably do this. This makes this relationship different than any male relationship I have. I might be willing to do a three-way or possibly even a DP with Seamas and his ex, but I would never do him or any other guy friend. Here is where I start to become unsure about some points that I felt intially felt were clear. If this bizarre scenario happened and I had sex with either of these two friends, it doesn't necessarily mean the end of our friendship. There are ample examples in movies or TV which shows how sex can destroy a friendship, but there are also examples of how friendship can continue after sex. If I have sex with a female friend and then we remain friends afterwards, are we genueinly real friends afterwards (meaning friendship without sexual tension or desire, and almost identical to a male friendship.) I think it's possible if I wouldn't accept the offer again because we wanted to just be friends. In contrast, if we kept repeating the offer, then I would say we were fuck buddies or "friends with benefits."


In the last paragraph, I speculated that JS's type of friendship could be possible if the sexual avenue were explored. In that scenario, JS and her male friend could have decided to explore sex. Afterwards, they agree that they don't want the relationship to have sex. At that point, I conceded that a sexual tension free relationship could be possible. I say it's only possible if both parties genuinely no longer desire any sexual relations now that it's been explored. If either party were willing to do it again (most likely the guy of course), then I argue that the friendship is still not a true one.

Male/Female Friendship w/out tension, w/out sex:

I should point out here that I'm exploring this question mainly from the perspective of the man. I feel that I have clear insight into male desire whereas I'm still trying to understand female desire. I should have said at the beginning that I do believe girls can have guy friends whom they don't desire. I think that happens very often, but as I said above, it's almost never true for the guy. Seamas and I tried to imagine what scenarios might allow a man to be free of secret sexual desires.

1) A PUA would need variety or he'd likely accept sex with female friends. We speculated that even if I were banging Giselle Bundchen and Jessica Alba regularly, I might still accept sex from a female friend. As damn fine as those babes are, a guy would still desire some variety. Now, if a warpig offered me sex, I'd almost definately refuse. Heck, I might even refuse now if the girl is ugly enough. (I think I'd most likely accept the offer from a HB6 or above in my current state.) If I were banging Alba and Giselle, though, I'd only accept variety sex from an extremely hot friend. If I had another model friend that threw herself upon me, it would be hard to refuse her advances. I'm assume her that accepting the sexual advances wouldn't result in me losing either woman. (In this fantasy, one might assume that would have to be the case as it would be impossible to balance even the two girl relationship without being discovered. Even assuming that I were banging just extremely hot 9's or 10's, we'd have to assume that I had some freedom in partners or I'd be busted by them. Also, even if the two girls just accepted each other, I'd be less likely to accept friend sex if it meant messing up my steady pussy.)

I'll summarize by saying the hotter my regular action is, the hotter my friend would have to be for me to accept sex from the friend. Not having enough variety, though, might increase the chances of my acceptance.

2) Assume that I'm having smoking hot MLRT (multiple long term relationships), but also have 1-2 FB's (fuck buddies) and I'm scoring frequent one night stands (ONS) from sarging. In this scenario, I have variety, so I'll be less likely to accept friend sex that I would in the above example. Of course, the hotter these girls are that I'm banging regularly, the hotter my friend would have to be for me to accept her sexual advances.

Seamas and I discussed this point and we concluded that this would be ultimate sceario that could solve the problem posed at the beginning. If I were having constant lays from MLRT's, FB's and ONS from extremely hot HB9-HB10's (true ones on my scale, see a future post for more details), then I could reach a point where I'd be so sexual satisfied that I would never accept a female friend's advances. At this point, it might be possible to refuse the advances of a HB10 model friend.

Back to reality:

I think that having explored sex in a friendship might be the only sceanario we've come up with which could result in a male-female friendship that has no hidden desires. To recap, in this situation, sex was explored and then both parties were able to relieve themselve of these desires. After having sex, they both felt like they really just wanted to be friends and they both wouldn't accept sex in the future from each other if one of them falters and wants it.

The other scenarios I posited are very unrealistic. I believe that I'll one day land HB10's but I think it's extremely unlikely that I'd have a steady stream of HB10 or even HB9+ sex. I do believe, though, that it's possible to have a MLRT's, FB's, and ONS, but I think the quality of the girls would be mixed. If I'm having almost daily sex, I think it would be possible to refuse the sexual advances of all my female friends. This is because I don't have any HB9's or HB10's. The less good looking my female friends are, the less likely I'd accept their sex offer in general, and even less likely I'll accept if i have regular action. If I had a ton of regular sex, but not with Super Hot Babes (SHB's), I imagine that it would still be hard (if not impossible) to refuse sex from female friends that were SHB's. I envision that even refusing sex from HB7.5+ would still be challenging.

Conclusions:
I'm getting sleepy since I've been up like 22 hours and only got 2 hours sleep last night, so I'll sum up what I think. I stick by what Seamas and I argued in the car with JS. Originally, I argued it was impossible for men to be friends with women in the same way that men are friends with other men. AFC's or lower would always have obvious or hidden sexual desires so sexual tension would always alter the relationship. I now modify the original point. Talking with Seamas and writing this has convinced me, for now, that this tension can be relieved through the sex taking place. Seamas says he's actually experienced this: he fucked some girls that he was friends with and then was able to put those girls on a friendship level that his guys friends are on. Without actually having sex, though, AFC's or lower can't have true friendships with women unless they find her completely undesireable. A PUA (or someone close to that level) has more control because he has sex regularly.

A PUA is not desperate like an AFC so he's less likely to harbor secret desires for female friends. If he desires a female, he'll work to game them until he gets rejected or he scores, so it's hard for him to wind in the friend zone, unlike AFC's. If he's there it's most likely by choice, meaning he doesn't feel sexually attracted to them (most likely b/c they aren't good looking enough for him.) The amount of sex he gets and the physical attractiveness of his parnters influences how hot a female friend (or even female partners in general) have to be before he'll even feel sexual desire for them. A female would have to be really hot for a PUA to let himself fall into the friend zone. I can envision a PUA getting trapped in the AFC trap with a SHB. In that case, he's like the AFC with hidden or obvious desires. A PUA, though, would almost never (I'd even be willing to say NEVER) would have the sexual tension with warpigs, and UG's. He could be real friends with them, and possible even average or even above average girls (again, depending on how much action he's getting and how hot his fucks are). By this, I mean, he can be friends with these girls just like he is with guy friends. With HB9 & 10's, it's going to be extremely difficult, if not impossible, for the PUA to not feel sex desire for them and to not accept a fuck offer.

Current Status:

I didn't really do any sarging today. I got like 2 hours of sleep and then spent the whole afternoon and night with Seamas. There wasn't much opportunity to sarge so I'm just going to review my progress with my game.

Sticking Points:
-I know that I'm recognizing angles that I can take, but I still don't have the stones to make the moves that I know I should make.
-Seemas's younger sister was at this family Christmas party that I attended. I've always thought she's hot. Now, she isn't a HB9 or anything like that, but she is the type of girl I find attractice. She's like 5'7", blonde, and has an attractive body. I've found her attractive ever since I used to see her hanging around Seamas's parents house in bikinis when she was 16. Of course, I was younger too in those days :) I thought about sarging her or even just talking to her but I didn't feel like I could do it. Seamas's family was always around and I just didn't feel comfortable. I was weak for not doing anything. That is the best opportunity I'd have to sarge her so I should have at least engaged her in coversation.
-We ate a Clarke's on Lincoln Ave. Just as I sat down, I made eye contact with the HB6.75 redhead (I like redheads about as much as I like blondes, maybe even more since true redheads are rare). We locked eye contact for about 5-7 secs and then she smiled and looked away. That's a good sign. I should have gone up and sarged her. Again, I found myself in a situation similar to yesterday, though today's scenario was two set so I could have opened them. I was tired today and didn't feel like sarging, but I still should have approached them.

Signs of progress:
-The alpha male walk and attitude is starting to get ingrained into me. Seamas's cousin hadn't seen me in a year and she told me that I look good. More important than that is that she told me that she notices a change in my behavior. She says that I show confidence now and by saying that she implies that I didn't show confidence or possibly show a lack fo confidence when I was an AFC.

-When I want to be beta about something, I recognize my feelings and make an effort to act like a dominant male. For example, Seamas's tuna sandwich tasted funny to he and his cousin. He was hesitant to send it back and in the past, I wouldn't have liked to do it. In the past, I would have just suffered and eaten it or just paid and not eaten it if I had been the one with the sandwhich. Now, I have a different view. I tell him that if it isn't satisfactory, he should send it back. I even did most of the talking because I wanted to prove to myself that I now speak up for myself. I explained to the manager that the pie, fries, and sald that we ate were good, but Seamas felt that the fish didn't taste right. For me, this is a strong change for me.

-Although it is part of a sticking point, I find myself able to lock eye contact with girls now. I knew I had to do that when I started this journey, but I still felt self-conscious doing it. Now, at Clarke's, I was able to look right at a girl and maintain eye contact. In the past, I would never have looked at her for more than 2 seconds if I our eyes met. Instead, I would have quickly looked away. It feels like it is one of the few times, if not the first time I've done this with some random girl. Lucky for me, I got rewarded with a smile. I know I got a smile because I know have confident body language and because I didn't look away when our eyes met. (Now, I just have to approach fearlessly like I do in the club in almost all venues and situations.)

-I've made this point several times, but it still is a gigantic development. I envision it will be as big of a development as regular lays are. At the club, I'm an approach machine. I'll keep talking to girls. The only improvement I have to make is that I should be approaching even more sets and making sure to "make the ho say no" (credit term to Gunwitch.)

-I'm still amazed that in most situations, most guys will move out of my way if I walk with alpha body language. I'm talking about when you're about to run into each other at the mall, or at the club. Before, I'd move out of the way with everyone. Now I just walk around like I own the place, and people move. If I run into people, I'll apologize b/c I don't want to be an asshole, but I don't go out of my way to move out of people's way. I also make sure to take up a lot of space when I stand instead of trying to take up as little space as possible.

Demonstrating skills for Seamas:

My buddy fly in from Gainesville today. I'm supposed to go out there in January to sarge out there. For the past two months, we've been talking theory and I've been giving him field reports. I was a little nervous about our first outing, because I wanted to make sure I could demonstrate some game. I didn't want to look like a KJ in front of Seamas.

We were running late so we ended up hitting Division and Rush with Paul. The only other place I could think of hitting was Lincoln Ave, but I know they close earlier than D&R so we went here. We first went in this place next to Mothers Two. There were two sets in the whole bar so we knew we had to leave. We talked for a few minutes, then I excused myself to the washroom. When I came back, I opened these two Asians, HB 6.5 & 7. The bar was really loud where the Asians were, so I didn't think I could do a lengthy opener. I just said, "Hi" and I asked them about some bars in the area. These girls were from Dallas, Texas and were in town until Sunday. I ejected early. Later, I tried to reengage the set. I could tell HB7 wanted to dance as she kept moving to the music. I tried to get Paul to dance with her but he was standing a few feet away. He tried to say something to the HB7, but I don't think she heard him and he just gave up. We both then just ejected. I find it hard to game in extremely loud environments so I don't feel bad that I didn't push the interaction sooner.

I went up to the other set in the bar. A fat blonde 6.5 and a HB7 (possibly 7.5) black girl. I kept the set going for a little bit but the HBB ended up dragging the blonde away. I think I definately could have kept gaming the blonde more but it's hard to keep both girls into a conversation when they can barely hear me.

Mother's:
Mother's had karaoke night in the downstairs area. I opened a set in the corner of the bar. I had walked around the bar once to scope it out. Then I went back with the intention of opening this two set. As I walked towards the set, I made eye contact with one girl and then she put up her hand to give me a high five. Again, I didn't use a real opener because I felt it was too loud to do so. I asked the girls if they were going to sing. Then, the girl that opened me looked kind of drunk, so I busted her on it. After I did that, she acted even more drunk by moving crazily to the music. I tried talked to the quiet friend, but wasn't getting anywhere, so I just ejected. In retrospect, that was stupid. I should have kept plodding since the girl had really opened me.

I greeted a few other girls that I walked by but didn't really make a real attempt to open until the C&B that follows this paragraph. I did joke around with this tall blonde who I was really attracted to. She seemed like a wild girl as she was dancing by herself and she had said that she would sing karaoke. I didn't actually see her do it, but in contrast, the friend had said she would not sing so the tall blonde was definately the wilder girl.

Rejected by UG's:

I feel bad about this approach because Seamas decided to actually come with me when I approached. We saw these two girls, both HB6's. I said hi and before I could say anything else, they pretended that they wear deaf and started making fake sign language. I knew they were full of shit because Paul and I had observed them talking normally earlier. I knew they were fucking with me, but I wasn't able to move forward like I had been with the Latina girls at Alumni who tried to pretend they didn't speak English. I tried to bust on them by saying that I knew they could hear me, but then I just turned and laughed about it with Seamas and we left. These girls were brutal and they acted in a way that Seamas had always feared girls might ask when approached. I hope to show him the better side of the game in the upcoming days.

We analyzed what had happened I insisted that their reactions had more to do with their own issues and had little to do with us. I get mad, though, when ugly girls blow me off like that. I think I finally was able to show Seamas why I never agreed with this theory. He used to tell me that he thought I should try gaming more ugly girls because it would be easier and better practice. I've noticed that UG's arent' really easier to game. At Alumni Club, I had two fat chicks backturn me immediatly after my opener. Average or even good looking girls will give me their attention, sometimes even more than UG's do. My current operating mode is that I just approach any sets that I see. I haven't really run into a HB10 set since I came back from Maui so I'm not sure if I can approach that type of set. I know that I can approach most girls anyway, so why purposely try to game UG's. If I happen to see a UG set to approach, I'll do it for practice, but I don't agree that it's good practice, in general, to focus on UG sets. I figure I'm going to face a lot of rejection anyway, so I might as well get rejected by hot girls. At least, I don't get as pissed.

Three-way:
Seamas claims that he might be able to arrange a three-way when one of his ex's when I go down to Florida. Well, he put out the idea b/c he said this girl has double penetration fantasies. I then said I'd be willing to do it as I've always wanted to be involved in a three-way. He then said he wasn't sure if he could do it with me. As I said in a previous blog, if I did a BBG three-way, the focus would be on the women. I'm not interested in doing guys, so I wouldn't do the guy or get worked on by the guy. I'm going to ask him more about this possibility because I'd love to do it.

Restaurant inaction:

I shoed my weakness for nonclub game. We went to Clarke's on Belmont and saw these two girls walk in with one guy. There was a blonde HB7.5 (possibly an 8) who didn't seem to be with the guy. Seamas and Paul talked about opening them. Some guy behind me tried opening the set but he got rejected. I was approaching easily in the bars, as I'm used to it, but I'm still not comfortable with sarging in "day game." This was even tougher than sarging at the bookstore, or possibly the coffee shop. Everyone in the restaurant would have seen me make the approach and if I failed, everyone would see that too. I know that I just have to not give a fuck about that, but I'm not at that level yet. At one point, Seamas and Paul had disappeared to the bathroom. I tried to talk myself into approaching because I know it would have been money for them to have come back and seen me at the girl's table.

Daygame is a sticking point for me. That's funny actually considering one of my first sarges two months ago was in a bookstore. I know that if I work on it, I soon won't give a fuck what people think and I'll just do it. I should focus less on the potential embarassment and try to feed on the fact that I know AFC's are impressed when they see guys sarging. Day game, especially approaching lone wolves is said to be a ton easier than club game. I'm getting better at club game, so I need to bust into day game.

Video game frame:
I need to get more into the video game frame, especially in the above mentioned day game scenario. On the drive home, I was thinking that a good way to get me into this frame is to ask Seamas to "program me." What I mean is that I want him to tell me what approach to use. He can tell me to use direct, or indirect. If he wants me to go indirect, he can tell me to use the tent opener or any routine I have memorized. He can also tell me to go situational. I then go in and use the opener and see what happens. That would take out some of the anxiety I have over choosing an opener and it makes me feel like I'm playing a game.

KJing

In mASF, KJing means "keyboard-jockeying." There are a bunch of guys in the community that believe that to become a PUA, you have to just keep reading more books and theories and eventually you'll figure it out. Instead of going out in the field, they keep reading more posts and more material. These guys will even begin to give advice to others based on the theory they have learned rather than from actual field experience. Here's a good post that I read to motivate me not to be a KJ.

Today I'm being a KJ ("chode" is a another term that is used). I got up at like 9PM. I pulled my left gluteal and calf muscle this weekend, so I can't run. I should have gone and weight lifted but I didn't. In my head, I knew that I should go out and sarge regardless of the fact that I didn't work out and wasn't feeling 100%, but I ended up not doing it. I read mASF. Next, I ironed my clothes and by 10:40pm, I was ready to hop in the shower. Then, I thought about what time I'd get there: I'd be ready by 11:05pm, I get to Alumni Club in Schaumburg by 11:30pm and then the place would close by 12:30am. As I thought of that, I just said "fuck it" and decided not to go out.

What I really decided to do was be a chode. I could have gone to Dakota's which is supposed to be busy on Tuesday and I believe it closes at 3am. I've heard that there are a ton of hot girls that go there on Tuesdays, too, but I've never checked it out. I think part of me was afraid I'd just have weak game, so I didn't go out. That's weakeness I have to fix that tomorrow, or at the lastest, Thursday when Seamas rolls into town.

Cadillac Ranch:
Ever since I got back into going to bars/clubs, I've wondered what's happening at Cadillac Ranch in Barlett. When I used to go out back in 2001, there was a deal between Alumni Club Schaumburg and Cadillac Ranch. After AC closed, they'd pass out passes that gave you free admission to Cadiallac Ranch. That was cool because AC closes at 1am on Mon-Thursday, but CR is open until 4am.

I've been wondering why Alumni Club is dead on Thursdays, I think it's because people are going to Cadillac Ranch. Metromix says CR plays Top-40 that night, so I bet it's packed with people. Wednesdays are "80's invasion" day and the rest of the nights are country music nights. I think I'm going to start going there on Thursdays since AC is dead then. Since Seamas is coming in Thursday, I'm actually thinking about checking out 80's night tomorrow night. I figure I need to get a night of practice in before Thursday.

What women think about sarging:
Seamas says he's told several women about how he wants to learn sarging. He says they laugh and think it's pathetic. I think it's because women picture all the AFC's that are at the bars. What they don't realize is that there are PUA's out there with real game. When they meet these guys they think the guy is just charming. When they end up having a ONS with the guy, they figure it just happened and they don't realize they've been gamed. That's the level I want to be operating on.


Mistakes of the past:
Earlier today, I was thinking about how I've been an AFC for like 28 years of my life. In all that time, I was terrified of women. I'd sit in class and get infatuated with some girl based almost 90% on her looks. Then I'd think about her for like 4-5 months and never really talk to her. I did talk to a few girls, but with them, I actually had zero game. I do dumb stuff to mess myself up because I couldn't get comfortable talking to the opposite sex. It bothers me that it was like half all my classes and interactions never existed. It's weird (but fulfilling) that I'm now talking to random girls at bars. I'm being more social and outgoing that I've ever been in my life. I think about how my life would totally be different if I had been doing this from the beginning. (When I think about that, I know that if I have a son, I have to teach him proper social skills. I have to teach him to be confident with girls.) Since I can't change the past, I have to avoid KJing and go out there and sarge like crazy.

Michael Vick/Ron Mexico:
This has nothing to do with sarging really, but I might as well went my thoughts on my blog. I could make a seperate nonsarging blog, but what's the point of that? I'd rather just ramble on in one blog.

I didn't do any sarging on Sunday. I just hung out with some friends and played a game of Risk 2210 and watched the games. My Vikings lost to the Steelers because Brad Johnson made some Aaron Brooks type decisions. In the ESPN game, I got to be in a room full of Bears fans (not a surprise since we are in the Chicago area). I was feeling pretty good about the game in the first half. When the Bears brought out Rex Grossman, I actually called the interception that ended up giving the Bears new life. I remember saying, "Watch Grossman do something stupid here," and then the Falcons pick it off, only to fumble it a few seconds later.

As for Vick, I used to really like watching him. He can be very entertaining with his rushes, but I'm starting to agree with the analysts that Vick can't be a pocket passer. He's so frustrating to watch when he has to pass the ball. Also, lately he only looks good against mediocre teams. Unless I seem some major improvement next year, I'm going to believe that he'll never win a Super Bowl.

Body language:
Actually, I now feel I can make a sarging related post. I didn't intend to write it, but reflecting on the day made me remember something. I met Sidegames in Oak Park and we ate at the Subway. After that, we were still hungry so we went to this Idine place down the street. I've been making a conscious effort to have Alpha male body language for the past few weeks. As it has become a part of my normal routine, I find myself able to observe more as I don't have to concentrate so much on having the right body language. Today, I noticed some girl in the restaurant checking me out as I was walking. In the past, girls would just look at me and then look away, but this girl held her gaze. I find all this humorous because though I'm working out, I'm still a ton overweight.

Heroin Craziness:
Sidegames has been going crazy. He told me that he met up with some girl he had met at AA and they ended up going to the "Spot" for heroin. I think Sidegames is really out of control and I actually felt uncomfortable talking to him at Subway. At first, I thought it was residual feelings about the situation with my ex, but I think it's more about his current lifesytle choices. I have no problem with him smoking weed, but I guess I should have. A lot of people can smoke trees and confine myself to that drug. Personally, I think weed is a lesser evil than alcohol even though I've never smoked trees. Sidegames, on the other hand, is showing that he really can't control himself. He figured he'd limit himself to weed, but I think he now has the mentality that if he's messing up in one little way, he might as well go all the way. (I do think he views smoking weed as being a fuckup. I think his periods of lenghty sobriety have made him internalize the fact that he is an alcoholic and having any drinks or smoking a single joint means he's messing up his life.)

I can relate to how he feels about weed in my eating habits. Yesterday was a prime example. I ate a healthy Subway sandwich and I was able to control myself at the Idine place by only getting a slice of pie. At James's place, I had a bunch of beers and then I ended up eating the junk food that everyone brought. Right before the Bear's game, people wanted to get food at Mickey's. I wasn't really hungry, but I figured I had drunk beers all day and had stuffed myself with snacks, so I might as well go down and eat a gyro and pizza puff. Right now, I still find myself in that mentality as I am strongly considering getting a half price pizza at Sir Nick's tonight. Perhaps, I'll just get some gyro meat at Caputo's and save myself money.

Going back to Sidegames for a moment, I'll say that I don't feel confortable talking to him because I see him going down a very wrong path. He's completely out of control. He told me that his family doesn't want to even talk to him unless he reforms his lifestyle. The funny thing is that they think he's only smoking weed; they have no clue that he's doing heroin again. I know I can't make him change his lifestyle, and I know it'll just make him not want to talk to me if I tried. I do appreciate that he's being honest with his stories and not hiding his problems like he did last year. (I found out that he was like this last year but he never told me because he was embarassed about it.) On the other hand, when he tells me stories, I keep wanting to help him change his lifestyle. I just limit myself to comments like, "Are you sure this is the path you want to take?"

I still have fun hanging out with Sidegames, but I'm not sure what the future holds. If he continues his craziness, I'm sure we'll hang out less because it's probably more fun to go do heroin with that girl than it is to hang out with a sober guy like me. I'd rather see him drinking like crazy because at least with that problem we could go to the bar together. I go to the bars to sarge all the time anyway. On the other hand, perhaps he'd bring down my game if we were going to the bar.

Better than Sex:
Heroin must really make you feel great. Sidegames said that he did heroin with that girl and then had sex with her. He said he didn't even feel like having sex because heroin feels way better than sex. That is almost incomprehensible to me. I guess I actually will never understand it as I'll never allow myself to do drugs. I confine myself to the occasional drink, because I'm sure I'd get out of control with drugs. I know Sidegames and I have very similar personalities so I could easily be him.

Sidegames left after one game of Risk. (On a sidenote, he won that because James gave up. That was annoying as I think James had a chance to win. I'm starting to understand what type of strategies really mess up James's game plan in Risk.) I'm convinced he went to the Spot afterwards even though he denied it.

Three-way:
I joked about a having a three-way with Sidegames and his girl. These drugs seem to mess people up so much that I bet they'd actually both lose their inhibitions and do it. Sidegames joked that he'd do it if I did some heroin with them.

On a serious note, I actually would like a try a three-way. Of course, I'd love every guy's fantasy of being with two women, but I'd also would try a double-teaming a girl with another guy. When I picture the two guys, one girl situation, I picture her performing oral sex on one guy and the other guy having intercourse with her. I'd probably even try a DP. I guess watching porn all these years has made me open to the idea. I just wonder if actually doing this stuff would be a turn-or or would it instead just be awkward. I guess it's likely to be awkward with people who aren't comfortable in themselves and their sexuality. I think I want to try it so I'll have the answer to my questions.

Women do love Sex:
This is something that mASF taught me. I honestly never realized this point until a few months ago. I always thought that wild sex stories is something that only happened in Penthouse Forum and in porno's. Someone on mASF linked me to this thread on www.femalefirst.co.uk. I haven't really read the rest of the site, but the thread asks other women, "What is the slutiest thing you've ever done?" I've only read the first two pages. One woman talks about how she had sex with a girlfirend's guy (the girls had talked about how big a cock he had) and then she went home to her boyfriend and banged him. Another girl was on a cruise and ended drunk in a room with four guys. Two guys switched off having sex with her while the other two guys watched. When she got back from the cruise, she went back to her boyfriend as if she had been the loyal girlfriend he thinks she is. Some of the stories on there are undoubtedly made up, but I'm sure many of them are true. Reading that thread is really a turn-on for me. It reads like a less detailed Penthouse Forum, but it still gets my imagination going. It also helps reinforce two points that will help me with sarging: that women do love sex, and that there are many women (and I bet the percentages are higher for women I'd meet in clubs) who are quite willing to cheat on their boyfriends and husbands. I can't wait until I actually meet some of these sluts.

BTW, I want to say that I don't view slut as a negative word like most people in society. I think it's great that some women don't bow down to society pressures. Instead, they enjoy sex as often and with as many partners as they want. As we all know, guys are encouraged to do that and gain status when they do that. Women, on the other hand, are viewed in all the negativity usually associated with the word "slut." These societial pressures are the reason PUA's will get ASD And LSR from girls. They might want to have sex with you the night you meet them, but they can't let their girlfriends see that they are going to do that. They also feel society's pressure to not be a slut so they'll keep putting up resitance to sex even though it's what they really want. I wish women could be as open about their promiscuity like guys could. It would make the game a lot easier.

AMOG's and a total BITCH

I was looking forward to building on yesterday's momentum. I now know that I have to go out at least 2-3 times a week or I end up having approach anxiety when I go back to sarging. Jason and I went out tonight for the first time in a month. I was looking forward to show that I've made some progress since our last encounter. We went to some place on the corner of Grand and Ashland in Chicago. I don't even know the name of it. We got there at 11pm and it was dead. Jason explained that it was a 4am place, so it would fill up later. Indeed, when we left, the place was packed, but there were too many guys packed in.

First approach:

I don't know if this even counts, but I'm trying to be more accurante in my count, so I'll mention it. Jason was saying that he'd like to talk to this one girl with glasses HB6. I turned and said, "Hi, are you having fun?" She gave me a weird look and kept walking.

BITCH set:
I usually don't use that term to describe my sets. The only other girl that deserved that term was the one at Alumni Club that messed up my inner game for a week. This was the first real set I opened. I told Jason I was going in and he followed me over. I'm not sure if I said, "Hi, how are you two doing?" or if I opened directly with the tent opener. I know that I definately said, "Hi" and quickly went into the tent opener. The tent opener hasn't been getting the "No" response that I had gotten the first 10 or so times I used it. Girls now are giving real answers. Anyway, I opened and Jason made some wisecracks about the tent. I think he does a good job, but then sometimes I think he makes me look beta by taking over the conversation.

In this set, there was a HB7.5bitch and a HB6.5 blonde. Jason was vibing really well with HB6.5. They were giggling and then even found out they have the same type of job. I was doing by best to game the HB7.5, but we weren't vibing. HbBitch then said really loudly, "Hey, she's married. I want you guys to know that this isn't going anywhere. You're nice guys but she's married and I have a boyfriend."
I tried to bust her out on that by saying, "What makes you think we're trying to pick you up. We're just talking."
She reponds, "I know what you two want and you're not going to get it here. We don't want to waste your time."
Me: Those two are getting along. Why don't you just let them be? I know you aren't going to let them hook up so why don't we just talk.
Jason then tried to talk to her but she wasn't having any of it. HB6.5 must have been drunk because she gave Jason a hug and then tried to give me a hug. I didn't give her a real hug because I didn't think they deserved it.

Bitch part 2:
Later we ended up next to these same girls. Jason and I start cracking up about them being next to us. We both turned to them and commented that we just happened to be standing there. I told them not to get the wrong idea. For some reason, Jason couldn't get the bartender's attention, so the girls ask us what we want to drink. Then, HB6.5 hands him a beer and he's reluctant to take it. I said he should take it because we deserve a free drink after the way they treated us. HB6.5 then says that she thinks we're nice, but the other girl again mentions that HB6.5 is married. (BTW, I'm thinking HB6.5 must be the cheating type if this friend is that worried about her.) I then ask where my drink is and HB6.5 tells me to share with Jason. I should have tried to grab HBbitch's water as I bet they would have let me have it.

Jason and the HB6.5 start vibing again. Jason kind of leaning over HBbitch to talk to HB6.5 and HBbitch won't make it easier for them to talk and just stays there as an obstable. I try to talk to HBbitch but she won't even acknowledge that I exist. I tell Jason that he can keep trying, but I was going to go talk to some other sets since this girl wouldn't even acknowledge me.

I'll say that HB7.5 wasn't a bitch like the girl at Alumni Club, but she sure did her best to control the situation in the first meeting and then just ignored me in the second meeting. I really want to know where she came off. She was decent looking, but I've had way hotter girls give me attention. I'd expect her attitude from a 9 or 10, but she wasn't good looking enough to have it. I'll give her some credit that at the beginning she was trying to let us off easy, but I still think it's BS that they assume I want them that badly when they aren't that hot.

Long set:
Right after the first set with bitch we walk towards the dance floor and see two girls. One's an UG5 and another is a HB6.5 Latina with dyed blonde hair. I just turn and open them. Jason ended up talking to the UG5 so I tried to game the Latina. We talked and I eventually ran the cube on her. While I was running the cube, I had my arm around her and she was cool with that. A few minutes later, though, she pushed my hand away and told me not to hug her like that. After that, I just wasn't feeling the vibe. I was talking to her but I just didn't feel that interested and I could tell she wasn't either. During this time, Jason had danced with the other girl for a bit and then they had come back.

Jason then went to get a drink. A friend of the girls came it. The Latina had mentioned that they were expecting a friend. The guy came up and started talking to the UG. I immediately went up to shake his hand. Jason then came back and he said we should just leave. I was fine with that as I knew my game had stalled with HBlatina. Jason also said he wasn't feeling it with the UG either. That set was the longest of the night though.

SHAQed again:
I'm pretty sure we got rejected on this set. I'm wondering if they heard me talking on the phone with Seamas. I had called him while Jason was on the dance floor. I was chatting with him when I saw two girls walk in. They ended up being next to me at the bar. These girls were probably both HB6.5's. Jason shows up after like 5 minutes, so I get off the phone with Seamas. I then walk a few feet and open the girls. I tell them that I just got off the phone with a buddy and I wanted to get their opinion on the tent guy. Jason cracks some jokes about it, and I saw I live in a car on the South side, and Jason lives in a tent on Lower Wacker. We all chat for a bit, but then Jason and the HBglasses start dominating the conversation. I then move Jason next to her (as I had been standing next to her) and I start talking to the other girl.

I start asking her what she does for fun and she says she really doesn't have time. She mentions that a friend is coming in from SF at midnight. I then ask her if she's been to SF and I ask her what she likes about it. We chat for a little bit. The conversation stalls and then I ask her if she's adventurous. She says she is but won't give me any story to demonstrate that she is. Then I say (and maybe this is where I messed up), "Surely you have some story. I know there's some stories your friend her knows about that you don't want to tell me and maybe there's even some stories you have never told anyone. I bet you can come up with something that's PG rated. Tell me something." She then says that they want to go sit down and she and the friend go over and sit in some chairs. Jason's girl leaves her cigarettes on the counter and Jason returns them and then walks away.

I'm not sure what happened. I might be reading too much into the timing of her departure. I suppose we could have followed them over to the chairs, but I was happy to just give up. I could tell I couldn't get a vibe going with this girl. She had her side facing me the whole time so I knew she wasn't that interested in what I had been saying. Later in the night, I made eye contact with her as we were about to leave but I wasn't going to reopen them. I think we had some stuff in common b/c she had mentioned that she was still groggy as she had just gotten up before they came to the bar. I guess she is a night person like me, but I never got to gain rapport with that.

4 set and my fear of dancing:

After the previous set, I see 4 Latina girls standing around. I turn to them and I say, "Hey, what's going on? It looks like you're all having a good time. Are you celebrating anything special?"
One of them replies that they are celebrating being done with school. Jason then does a good job displaying a party guy imagine by giving high fives. Jason ends up talking with the two near the bar. I end up talking to this HB7.5tall girl. I notice 2 guys run into her as she in an awkward spot where people kept walking by. I bust on her by saying, "Hey, I think they need to cut you off. You keep running into people."
She giggles and we talk for a bit. I knew we had some vibe as she ended up facing her body towards me. We chatted for a bit. I then accidentally bumped her foot at some point, and I joked, "Hey, you're running into me again. You're not the drunk one of the group, are you?"
The friend next to her started giggling. We chatted for a bit, but then this song game on that HBtall really liked. It came on right after I had asked a question. She leaned to her friends and said she wanted to go dance. Right after that, though, she apologized.

I know I should have just pulled her to the dance floor, but I'm a little self-conscious about dancing. I had danced by myself earlier in the night to a Madonna song, but I just haven't had good experiences dancing with girls so I didn't want to pull the girl to the dance floor. I bet she would have gone as the friends were slow in going out together. The two girls by Jason were taking a long time to get their drinks from the bartender, and HBtall's friend apparently didn't want to dance only with HBtall. Eventually, they all walk to the dance floor and I try to get Jason to go with but he won't.

Later, I spotted the set near the bar. I should have reenaged HBtall, but decided to open another girl instead. Later, I wanted to try talking to HBtall again, but I couldn't find her.

Quick set, and didn't open blondes:
I opened a girl that I thought was lone wolf. She said it was some dude's birthday next to her, so I talk to him and then just ejected.

We ended up leaving because the place was getting crowded. As we are heading for the door, we see two hot blondes dancing. Jason noticed them as he said, "Are you sure you're ready to leave?" I was about to open them but then I kept walking. At the coat check, I ask Jason if we should go back and talk to those blondes. He says that he saw they were with some dude. I was happy with just leaving.

AMOG:
We got to the new Rock & Roll McDonalds. We end up using the parking lot because we see it's free with a $6 purchase. Inside, we learn that it's free except for Friday & Saturday nights. We ended up getting ripped off $8 for 10 minutes parking. It's our fault b/c we didn't see the exception at the bottom. I had been the one who wanted to go in, but I would have done drive thru rather than let myself get raped for the $8.

Inside, we're standing in line, and Jason and some dude end up exchanging insults. They accuse each other of being gay. I try to defuse it by saing, "Hey, why don't you guys take it easy? I don't want to hear about gays. If I did, I go to Halsted and Broadway (the 'Boy's town' area."
Dude: Hey look at you with your Bahama Mama shirt.
Me: It's a Hawaiian shirt that's made in Hawaii (which it is.)
Dude: Are you Hawaiian?
Me: No.
Dude: I knew that.
Me: Lol. Really, I bet you've never been there. (I turn my back to him and order.)
Dude (to his friend): This guy thinks I've never been to Hawaii. I lived in Hawaii.
Me (I turn and look him right in the eye and say): Oh yeah. Where did you live?
Dude: Kona.
Me (I was ready just to drop this, but my BS meter was going off so I ask him a simple question): Oh yeah. What island is that on?
Dude: O'ahu.
Me: LOL. Dude, Kona's on the Big Island, not O'ahu.
Dude: I lived there too.
Me: Oh yeah. What town?
Dude: I lived near Diamond Head.
Me: (I knew that there were houses near Diamond Head that were like 20 million each. I was pretty sure he was full of shit.) Really? So you lived in one of those 20 million dollar houses?
Dude: Yeah.
Me: Then tell me why you're here in Chicago in the middle of winter.
Dude: You have to pay the bills somehow.
Me: Yeah (sarcastically).
Somehow, the guy said something that prompted me to say, "I was just in Maui two weeks ago."
Dude: Yeah, what city, Lahaina. (I'm surprised he knows a city there, though that would be the one that most people know. That and Kahului.)
Me: Kapalua. (backturn again.)
Dude: (I hear him say to his friend that he only lived there for 3 months.

Jason and I sit down and laugh about the guy. Jason wants to talk more shit, and I tell him not too because I really would rather not fight anyone, though I didn't think they'd do anything. As we walk out, I see them sitting at a table near the entrance. I looked at the guy and said, "Have a good night guys." I like showing guys that I don't give a shit and will still talk to them after some verbal sparring. Plus, I feel like I tooled him because we all knew that he was full of shit after I had asked him all those question. As we are walking out the second door, Jason mumbles some insults but they either don't hear or don't respond.

Lessons:
-I need to make the first approach as soon as possible. I took like 20 minutes to make an approach after we walked in. Granted, there were only like 2 sets we could have opened, though I did chicken out at the beginning. I was telling Jason about the shy opener. I wanted to say, "Hey, are you girls shy?... We've been standing her five minutes and you haven't said, 'Hi.'" Jason said he'd be really impressed if I did it. I almost opened this one set, but I debated it for a few minutes and then they ended up leaving.

-After I make the first approach, I feel like I'm on crack or something. It's a rush and I keep on wanting to open more sets. When I get rejected, I really want to open another set immediately. It's like part of me wants to show the set that rejected me that I don't care and that I'll go open more girls.

-The worst possible thing for me to do at the bar is to not approach. Even though I had good reasons for not doing anything last week when I was with Sidegames and my ex, I still felt horrible afterwards. I was so mad that I didn't approach any sets. Tonight, even though I didn't get any numbers, I feel great. I can see that if I keep approaching, I'm going to get good at this game.

-I should reenage sets. I don't know why I avoid doing. If I got totally rejected, I shouldn't reengage, but if I didn't and it seemed to be going well, I should open the set again.

-I need to start carrying around hand sanitizer. I hope I'm not getting sick now, but I wouldn't be surprised if I do. I just hope I don't b/c I want to be able to sarge like crazy with Seamas when he comes in on Wednesday.

-I hope that anti-smoking ban gets passed. Since I don't get the Trib anymore, I don't know whatever happened with the vote that was supposed to go down. I hate how my clothes stink of smoke after the bar and I know it's terrible for my lungs. Why should I have to breathe that crap? Smokers can poison their lungs, but why does everyone else have to join them? The restaurants are so full of shit when they claim that they'll lose business with a smoking ban. Restaurants and bars in other cities that have passed the ban didn't notice any decrease in revenue. What I'd really like it for IL to pass a law like CA has.